rant

[jeslowe115]

I'm so pissy right now it isn't funny. I spent all that time monday and tuesday trying to get the apartment looking a little better and by 9pm last night, you wouldn't be able to tell that I had anything done.

I will admit, it wasn't 100% (more like 75%) I figured that it would take no more than 2-3 hours (not counting laundry and any dishes that I would dirty this weekend) to finish cleaning. Well, now it's going to be 5-6 (hopefully).

I am so pissed that it seems like I did all the work and Aaron had no respect for it. I understand that taking care of Kaleb while I am work isn't the easiest thing in the world, but both nights when I got home from work, he was on the computer playing poker. I can't complain about him being on the internet, but I try to limit my time on the net to when I have everything done (or at least what I would like to get done at the time) and when Kaleb is sleeping.

Yes, he did make dinner while I was at work, but he left dirty dishes all over the kitchen and the counters and stove top needs to be cleaned. I wouldn't have minded the dirty dishes that much if they would have been in neat piles and the counters clean.

Plus anything that he had out in the living room, was left where he had it (playstation, magazines and dvds). I keep trying to tell him that he needs to pick up after himself because sooner than later kaleb is going to be getting into everything and it will just be easier if he leaves the stuff out. I had the living room picked up (all I needed to do was vacuum). Now I have to pick up before I can even think about that.

And I'm fixing to start throwing his clothes away if I have to pick them up out of the floor anymore. I set the laundry sorter up in the hall after rearranging the bedroom and I keep a basket in the bedroom too, but yet his laundry can't find at least 1 of the 2 things.

Then, last weekend, he told me that he would help me work on the nursery. Well, that was like pulling teeth. I would tell him that I am going in there. I would start and wait to see if he would come and help (Kaleb was sleeping in our room so that wasn't a reason why he wasn't helping). I finally gave up on his help and just started working on it myself. I have made it pretty far. I have 2 boxes that need to go to other rooms (which I plan on taking care of this weekend). Then there are 3 more boxes that need to be gone through and there are 2 piles of things that need to go to storage (which Aaron said that he was going to take 1 of them Wednesday, but that never happened). Once I get the stuff down to storage, it should be a lot better.

We took the bassinet down Wednesday night and I got it ready to go to mini storage. It felt odd taking it down, but I knew that it was time to do that as we don't use it (Kaleb's too big for it) and it was just taking up space. Now if I can just get Aaron to take that stuff to mini storage, it will make the nursery that much closer to being done.

I'm just sick of feeling like I bust my ass to get things looking respectable and he doesn't lift a finger to help. I don't know what to do to get him to change either. I've tried asking, complaing, not saying anything, not doing anytying and it just doesn't do anything. I'm getting to the point where I can't take much more of it and I don't have the time to do it myself all the time. I feel like a fucking servant, not a loving wife anymore.

Well, I am done ranting for the time being. I'm sure that some of this is also due to the fact that I am PMSing (or at least I think I am- the shot has really messed up my cycle).

Comments

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I've been working on it for 6!!! years.

[janke.livejournal.com]

You'll get there eventually. LOL!

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I hope so. I keep trying and at times it seems to be going in the right direction and then at times it seems like I get knocked back to square 1. I wish I could just get him into a habit and have him stick to it.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Like I said you'll get him there at some point. It may take a little while but I believe that you can get him into some sort of a routine.

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I know, but I don't know how much longer I can take it. I think I've given him more than enough time. It just seems like him being gone for work the way he is just messes everything up.

[janke.livejournal.com]

I'm sure with the hours that he works the last thing he wants to worry about when he gets home is cleaning the oven and the living room. But he has to understand that you also work 8 hours a day sometimes and you don't WANT to clean but it something that HAS to be done. Maybe instead of nagging him you just sit down and explain that you understand that he works hard and doesn't want to clean but if you work together it gets done faster and you won't nag him as much.

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I've tried that. It usually works until he goes back to work.

I tell him that things would be different without Kaleb (as I would have more time to do housework) but taking care of Kaleb can be like a full time job at times (especially when he is being particularly crabby).

[janke.livejournal.com]

I don't know what else to tell you but to kick his butt into gear a few times. :-)

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I know. I'm just at a loss for the time being (and I'm so afraid that Kaleb will pick up on his habits).

I've tried doing nothing, everything, asking nicely complaining, explaining and all the times it feels like I am talking to a brick wall.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Don't know what else to tell you. I had a friend who's husband didn't do anything at home. In fact she couldn't remember him ever changing a dirty diaper the entire time, and they had three kids. Now she has a boyfriend that does the laundry, cooks AND cleans. And my other friend's husband cleans kitchen and dining room floors by hand. LOL!

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I guess I could call myself a little lucky then, as Aaron does help with Kaleb when he is home. I'm going to just have a sit down with Aaron to see what we need to do to get him to help out more (like see what he thinks I need to do etc).

[janke.livejournal.com]

That's the best thing to do. Just ask what you need to do to get him to help.

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I know, but when you get the "I don't know" answer, I just want to cry.

[janke.livejournal.com]

I don't blame you, I would feel the same way if it was me.

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I know. I feel like at times, I am just at my wits end with him.

[janke.livejournal.com]

See I'm bad at giving good advice in this department because I'm the single one of the group. LOL! I can't give good advice because my own advice isn't working for me. LMAO!

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

That's ok. Sometimes single people can see things differently just because they are not dealing with a relationship everyday.

[janke.livejournal.com]

That's true. And I've had my fair share of bizarre relationships. LOL!

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

lol. I hear you there. Every guy I have dated, I met on the internet.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Same here. I don't think I've dated anyone any other way. LOL!

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I'm not planning on it either (because if I do that means something bad has had to have happened). I definately don't want to be dating again...ever....because dating just sucks.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Everyone keeps telling me, oh when you stop looking, that's when you find someone. I haven't been looking since I broke up with my ex, May 2006.....nothing has hit me yet. So whatever.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Everyone keeps telling me, oh when you stop looking, that's when you find someone. I haven't been looking since I broke up with my ex, May 2006.....nothing has hit me yet. So whatever.

[jwood614.livejournal.com]

I don't really know what to say. I wasn't looking when I met Aaron. At the time, I was just sick of guys in general and wasn't looking for a relationship. So, I guess I can say that in a way it can be true.

[janke.livejournal.com]

Maybe I just have to not look, harder.....or something like that. LOL!